You told your employer two weeks.
Now you're hearing it could be eight.
Nobody has said a word about lost wages.
Three questions would change that, and they fit in one short conversation.
The order you ask them in matters.
Two weeks became eight, and nobody brought up pay
One donor was told the trip could be "8 weeks or more" after she'd already promised her employer two weeks.
That gap is where money disappears.
A family donor who coaches gymnastics put it plainly:
"I wish I would have known what questions to ask at the beginning."
She added that if she couldn't coach, she had no other income.
That sentence is the reason this list exists.
"Expenses covered" is a phrase, not a plan
Ads say it and agency chats repeat it.
Almost nobody itemizes it.
Airfare, baggage, parking, rental car, meals, a companion, pet fees.
Donors say all of it stays vague until a bill shows up.
A phrase that loose can mean anything.
Three answers turn it into numbers you can plan around.
Question one is the cap
What's the limit?
Donors report that reimbursement caps and procedures often go unexplained, so nobody can tell whether they'll be made whole.
One UK donor said her compensation was "nearly depleted, leaving very little 'profit'" after time off, travel and other expenses.
Ask for the number before you spend a dollar.
A cap you know about is a budget.
A cap you find out about later is a surprise.
Question two is which receipts count
Reimbursement runs on documentation.
Donors who skipped receipts on small things like cab fares and parking learned that the hard way.
One donor kept a running spreadsheet of every meal, Uber, parking day and baggage fee.
Ask which categories qualify and what proof the agency accepts.
Then keep the agency's texts and emails, because they show what was promised.
Once the receipts are sorted, one question is left, and it decides when your money comes back.
Question three is how long until you're paid
"After retrieval" is an event, not a date.
Meanwhile donors front airfare, exam fees, visa costs and even COVID tests on their own card.
Ask for a stated turnaround, in days.
One TikTok donor alleged she had 16 eggs retrieved and no payment five months later, despite a 90-day contract term.
You want the number of days on paper before anyone books a ticket.
Paper is the next piece, because a promise made on a call is easy to lose.
Get all three in writing, not in a phone call
A friendly answer on the phone fades by the time the bill comes.
Ask that the cap, the receipt rules and the turnaround appear in the contract itself.
One donor left her first cycle's expense terms unwritten and paid travel-related fees herself.
She rewrote the contract for her second donation.
You can skip the first lesson and start with her second contract.
Timing is the last piece, because the day you spend your first dollar is the day your options shrink.
Ask before the first purchase, because spending changes the math
Once money leaves your account, walking away gets harder.
Donors describe feeling pressure to continue simply because they'd already spent.
One donor who backed out before injections was asked for $3,400 in screening and exam costs within ten days.
Ask what happens financially if screening fails or a cycle is cancelled.
Do it while you still owe nothing to anyone.
Your paycheck belongs on the same list, and it's the item most likely to get skipped.
Lost wages go on the list too
A family donor learned after starting that lost wages were never discussed.
Another donor took about 8 days off work for an out-of-state cycle and counted the lost pay only afterward.
Put the same three questions to your income.
Is there a cap, what proof is needed, and when does it arrive?
Because the timeline can stretch, ask what changes if two weeks turn into eight.
Some of you can't cover even one ticket while you wait, and that needs its own early conversation.
If you can't float a ticket, say so early
One donor's advice was to "get that money advance to them before they actually travel."
An advance is something you negotiate, so it has to be raised before the trip.
Ask who books the flight, you or the agency.
Ask it before the ticket needs buying.
Then there's the worry that keeps most people quiet, and it deserves a straight answer.
Asking does not make you the difficult one
You may worry that questions will mark you as high-maintenance.
Look at what donors actually ask each other in private groups.
Who books the flight? What does "expenses" include? Is this contract clause normal?
Those are ordinary questions, and honest answers are easier to get from women who've done it.
A donor with a clear checklist tells an agency she's serious.
For family donors, though, the hardest question isn't for the agency.
Asking about money doesn't put a price on your sister's baby
This is your sister, and that's the real weight here.
Yet one family donor quietly covered some costs herself "just to make things easier for her."
Quiet absorbing tends to build until it comes out sideways later.
Three plain questions asked now keep the conversation small and kind.
You're helping your sister become a parent, and nothing on this list changes that.
You just get to keep coaching while you do it.
Send the three questions before you book anything
Write them down today.
What's the cap, which receipts count, how long until you're paid.
Add a fourth line for lost wages.
Send it before you buy a single ticket.